it's a complicated life

2007-02-02T07:28:00.000-08:00

Somehow this week just seemed to have passed really fast. But I think it's partly cause of the very minimal amount of work accomplished this week. haha me and cariann just turned into lazy employees and tried our best wasting as much time as possible. We actually got so bored yest we started writing lame knock knock jokes on this whiteboard in our office room and playing 'pranks'. I think it's no wonder people think we're sec sch kids sometimes.
Been giving tuition and I'd never thought I'd say this but I quite enjoy it. Like how my tuition kid looks at me and goes 'huh?'. Then I'd start speaking in super lay man terms and he ironically actually gets me. But then again, I feel like there's only so much I can do and really hopes he remembers what I teach. But I've been there before, it's just so easy to forget sometimes.
Anyway, I've been reading kite runner. It's one of those stories you can't forget and really feel for the characters. Haven't read a storybook in such a looong time but I really like this one. and it's reading stories like this I wish I could write a heart warming novel as well. Like I said, I wish. haha

2007-01-19T04:36:00.000-08:00

Okay, now for a proper entry. Been doing powerpoint slides all day, but I would actually much rather create slides rather than photo edit and animate slides the whole time. This job is weird and mean! They only call me when they need me. haha
Anyway, I never really realized how intimidating a new job can be. There's always the prospect of having a mean boss or unwelcoming colleagues. And no, that's not the case for me right now.. Everything's fine and stuff. (pause)
Printer's driving me craazyyyy. I can't install it properly(not suprising). I'll write more stuff here some other time.

2007-01-18T20:57:00.000-08:00

HI
I'm like blogging from office. It's lunch break now and cari's trying to sleep while waiting for lunch to be served to us! hahaha
obviously i'm bored, despite the never-ending powerpoint slides. lunch's here. bye

2007-01-03T06:23:00.000-08:00

Just another day

It's day 3 of 2007 and I'm not at all prepared for a new year. No resolutions, no work to get done, no..nothing. It's almost weird. Anyway, can you imagine, I spent the last few hours of 2006 in front of my comp. Since my friends pangh sed and ruined my new year plans, I thought what the heck.
So much has happened and I haven't really reflected on what happened the past year. I mean, I thought for once I would reflect on 2006 and see where I've gone wrong rather than make up resolutions I hardly ever keep. heh
It's also officially the day school starts, though it doesn't apply to me. Seriously, going out today and seeing kids in school uniform..it's almost surrreal to know that school life like that has ended for me. oh and i'm jobless. I swear staying at home for another week or so would drive me up the walls. I've sent out *&&^^% no. of resumes and NO ONE REPLIES. okay, maybe not so many but rather depressing no one replies. But a lady did call me today and asked if I was interested to be a HR asst. for 2 weeks. I was like sure, but I have no idea if it's confirmed or anything like that..she basically didn't say anything else.. oh well, we'll see about that.
and prison break officially rocks! =)

2006-11-28T07:27:00.000-08:00

Seriously.

You know what's so cool about the word seriously? It can be a question as well as an answer! Like "Seriously?, Seriously!" yeah.
EVERYONE I meet now's just been asking me how the exams went. All I can say is "err..okay." Honestly, I don't know what else to say. I don't know what they expect to hear either, it's kind of an expected reply, you know?
Anyway, my internet connection's been cranky and it cuts off randomly. So no desperate housewives or greys anatomy unless some kind soul invites me to their house! heh. I think I've this really bad problem of not managing my time well. I've SOOO much time in the world now and I have no idea what to do with it. Oh, and today's the first day I actually sat down, scanned thru' classified, made a few calls and already I feel disheartened. I neeeed a job, desperately. I realized that I literally wiped out half my allowance in 2 days. And prom's coming. =x And I've nothing to do for the next 8 months.
I'm really sick of my blogskin layout which I should change SOON. Haha, well I'll try.

If not for that, I'd still be clinging on to that tiny ray of hope which could never be anyway. So I'm glad things worked out this way. Like they say, everything happens for a reason.

2006-10-26T10:08:00.000-07:00

Oh man, this is IT.
Sigh, time reeally flies, especially so when we're having fun. It's almost unfair.. I mean, we already officially graduated. damn, wouldn't it be great if we could turn back time and relive those days. Seriously, I've had great times in both ac and cj. I remember we were blatantly breaking the school rules then by taking the forbidden lift, getting scolded and chased out but that apparently didn't stop us. haha And in cj, I was really just getting to know some of my friends better and just like that grad day had to come. whyyyyyyyyyyy?
oh well, staying home's been a BORE. And so there's the guilty pleasures, as I would like to call it to look foward to. Grey's Anatomy! and desperate housewives la, but practically everyone in the show is just mean now. Anyway, I seriously get all happy and excited to watch grey's and I have to do it when mum's not around. Guilty pleasures. Ironically the last episode I watched was about the guilt most, if not all the characters were facing. Meredith especially! haha, well at least she made a decision.. and I'm pretty sure no one has any idea what I'm talking about. oh yes and chocolates. it has endorphins and it's supposed to make you happy, so technically....... it's not that bad right..
But it is! it's just fats waiting to accumulate in your body. chocolates are evil.
and so, it's back to mugging. another entire month to endure. time's passing to fast, yet too slow rite now, you know?

2006-09-18T02:08:00.000-07:00

Ann's sad, cause she just lost her fav. watch.
Can the kind soul who picked it up report it to lost and found..
sigh.
anyway, I haven't blogged for so long I almost forgot my username to log in.
oh prelims are pretty crappy, especially felt i screwed bio the worst. and maybe chem, and well, pretty much everything. I CAN'T STAND DOING PURE MATHSS. seriously, the more I do it, the more I like stats better. haha
-if only my watch could crawl back to me. I'm sure it misses me like crazy.

2006-08-05T06:09:00.000-07:00

You know, the theory of self-medication apparently doesn't work on me. Why do I ALWAYS fall sick?! Funny how I think I fell sick ard this time about a year ago. Well, it's not that bad.. considering I can sleep the whole day and not wake up with a throbbing headache..
gosh, I sure miss those carefree ndp days last year. Just spending all those saturdays, basically doing nothing but playing bridge the entire afternoon and then hanging out at the esplanade. (haha, and we even got cip hours for that). Now, it's like spending every saturday trying to discipline myself to actually study. boring, but what must be done.
ohh, after going for the nus talk, life sciences doesn't seem that bad after all. I know it's hours of working in the lab, but you might be testing on interesting drugs and chemicals and stuff.. Only drawback is that it's quite a loner job. PLUS, an average B grade to enter! which basically means, if I don't get B's, my dreams of going nus will be shattered?! nooooooo. never...
Honestly, I actually like biology as a subject. I think it's pretty interesting how you have a million reactions going on inside of you. How your every heartbeat is synchronised and controlled so intricately. but, i kinda suck at it. It kinda makes me loathe studying it. and I don't wanna believe what mr goh predicted about our results! I reeeeeally hope we prove him wrong.

2006-07-16T09:25:00.000-07:00

I am not dumb!

okay, what I really wanna blog about is about the horrible crappy mid years. What reaaaally affected me was the really ugly F i got from maths. It's a horrible F too. gosh, when I got back my paper, I seriously never felt so dumb before (sitting beside huisi wasn't helping). and then, I spent the whole day trying to think of reasons which could have made me dumb (sounds silly, i know) and blaming whoever didn't implant the smart math gene into me, that smart math gene my brother got instead. Anyway, after a long while, I kinda figured that when you really phyche yourself into believing something(sth negative), the more likely it'll be. which reminds me, there's even a term for it. the self-fulfilling prophecy. okay, I'm not dumb. I can speak.
yeah, so I know I'm not the only one failing. but seriously, it's freaking out time for me. 108 days doesn't exactly seem like a very long time to me. Such grades can demoralize you when actually, it should be all the more reason to spur that determination in you to work harder. I know I should be feeling the latter, but it's pretty demoralizing too.
On a totally different note, I have cravings for noodles! yes, noodles. it's good for you, better than rice actually. (please don't think it's my first time eating noodles). I just have a new found affinity for it. =)

2006-07-05T07:36:00.000-07:00

World cup fever

Well, it's just a once in four year thing. I guess that could excuse waking up at 3am recently to catch the match. Speaking of which, it's portugal and france in a matter of hourssss and I can't wait, of course. I support portugal still, despite their apparent low chances of winning. I mean, they've come this far. I just love that team i guess. I foresee a close fight between the two though! haha
ohh and I don't get why ronaldo is being blamed for rooney's send off. Why blame him when it's rooney who can't control his anger. i swear, england always has someone to blame for their loss. not that I'm against them or anything tho'. I'm just supporting portugal rite now. Decoooooooo!

2006-06-17T10:39:00.000-07:00

yay!

PORTUGAL won!

and Deco rox.

like seriously. =)

2006-06-17T10:35:00.000-07:00

-myanmar trip.

i miss them!

seriously?

and we're in the filthy "chinatown"

their traditional wear.

heh. the next morning

with her brother and sister

if i look diff, it's the hair!

check out the bed!

me new sis-in-law!

awwww.

that's my brotherr and his wife

one bigg family eh.

what you looking at.

all the GOLDEN statues

=)

feeding the fishes

brothers in crime!

2006-06-04T10:10:00.000-07:00

ohhhhh kay. It's past first week of hols, and I thought I'd update at least once before I leave. Leaving this wednesday for myanmar, if I haven't already mentioned it like a dozen times in this blog, MY BROTHER'S GETTING MARRIED. =) weddings are fun, especially if there're not in s'pore.. i think. oooh, i'll blog more when I get back, hopefully my camera makes it there.
hmmm. let's see, past few days have been pretty greatt...
like watching at least 15 episodes of grey's anatomy in 2 days.
like watching the 99% retarted show (benchwarmers)
like mixing ice cream in beer (it produces bubbles somehow)
like meeting my bro's friend who turned out to be a priestt and then going to his monastery. their place's sooooo cool.
like going rom for the first time
like going to the hospital to visit my aunt only to find that she was discharged that morning.
.
.
okay.. shall stop with the like thing. anyway, I was kinda out of place at this wedding my bro brought me to cause everyone else was pretty dressed up. and yeah.. weddings are supposed to have this happy feel and everything, but this time the bride was in tears when saying her vows, not that it was tears of joy.. no, it was different. Her parents weren't there, not even her sis cause they didn't approve of it. WHYYYY. it was kinda saddening la
can't believe 1 wholee week of hols just passed, not like I've done anything productive since. And you know what? I imagine myself trying to cram every single thing into the last week of hols. ahhhhhhh
oh well.
I'm still looking foward to the trip.

2006-05-21T02:37:00.000-07:00

This is kinda long overdue post and what I meant to say has kinda lost its significance to me. Yes, one week can change things. Not that my opinion has changed, I still think you're mean. And well, I'm not clinging on that anymore, just bury it.
Another thing I don't understand is why some get so worked up about something like that. And then to take it out on me? when my "wrongdoing" was to be in favour of what I like. oh well.
A lotta things happened in the span of one week. Did I tell you I killed 22 cockroaches in my house when I was all alone? They were all baby ones, like tad bit bigger than the size of an ant, but still.. gross stuff. I was like standing on a chair and spraying the insecticide. haha
Had 2 spa's this week which I was not exactly very prepared for, especially bio. I was like dead tired on thursday when I came back and I fell right into bed after merely reading it thru'. Cant believe I did that, I don't usually.
oh and miss Low's comments just made me especially sad. I kinda guessed it was coming tho' cause I just know I'm writing crap lately. and gp exam is like what? 5 days away? wonder what can salvage me now.
hmm, and I fell down yet again. Like what's new right? I seem to be super clumsy la. I got abrasion at the SAME spot where I fell down the last time. -.- Thankfully it was just minor cuts(fell at grand stand).
And I baked cheeseeeeeeecake! (: For some random reason. Wanted to just bake something with LOTSA chocolate but the recipe didn't work out so I just baked a plain cheesecake. The only wrong thing I did was to pour in the whole can of condensed milk! hahah. Just imagine how sweet it is la. But it's still good(cause I made it) heh.
+ prata and bandung dinosaur = sinful sinful sinful foodstuff. but it rawks.
And I'm seriously driving myself crazyy listening to that stupid song "I drive myself crazy" over and over againnnn in my house. arghh.

2006-05-12T05:52:00.000-07:00

A time to be born, and a time to die

A time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted;
A time to kill, and a time to heal;
A time to break down, and a time to build up;
A time to weep, and a time to laugh;
A time to mourn, and a time to dance;
A time to throw away stones, And a time to gather stones together;
A time to embrace, And a time to refrain from embracing;
A time to seek, and a time to lose;
A time to keep, and a time to throw away;
A time to tear, and a time to sew;
A time to keep silence, and a time to speak;
A time to love, and a time to hate,
A time for war, and a time for peace.

2006-05-12T03:21:00.000-07:00

gawwwwwwd. I suck at pool! seriously, if there's one person you could laugh at while playing pool, it's me. haha. I think the white ball has something against me. oh, and there was this foozeball table when we entered mambo.. I was telling cariann about it and the cashier guy probably overheard us and he asked me if I played fooze ball, and I could sign up for sth like that. coolness.
Had a nice long conversation with my brother yesterday, when my parents weren't around. I was just rambling on and on about everything here, like the good ol' days when he was here. sigh, I sure miss him. And one of the reasons being I could tell him anything and everythingg. anyway, I can't wait to go over and see what's it's like in Myanmar, can't wait for his big day. ahah

We're never in control of our lives aren't we. We can't really control what happens around us. Maybe it's a combination of fate, destiny and karma. Karma sure does sting by the way. But above all, I know He's watching everything. And if this is the worst of my problems, I should feel blessed, very blessed.

2006-05-06T06:19:00.000-07:00

Decided to do a short follow up on cari's post. I soo agree with that, "what doesn't break you only makes you stronger". Still, that said, I'm real scared of going through something like that all over again. Just thought I could never trust myself again, for being naive and what-not. ah well, the past happened for reasons I can't comprehend, and won't try to. I'm believing everything happens for a reason.. so yeah.
Rushed to church yesterday after some failed mother's day shopping. And I finally filled my pastamania craving! I really don't know what mum would like, we have such contradicting taste. Chocolate's probably the safest option now. Felt a sudden need to pray and just heal all those feelings within me. There I was, in complete realization that God loves me so much and I'm fretting about other things that shouldn't really matter anyway. How silly could I be.. I need that faith that He's right there beside me, that the paths I take from now on are guided and I'll make the right decisions.
ohh, and you know something. I alwayss wondered how two guys, or two girls for that matter could really love each other. I used to think it's all made up in their heads or something. haha but well, after reading colin&kero's blog, they're like so sweet towards each other. I really don't think they're making it up, they genuinely feel for each other. hmmm. how interesting.

2006-04-22T07:42:00.000-07:00

Choice.

Thought the gp passage a few days back a bit appealing to me. Are we better off with absolute freedom of choice or have that freedom restricted? I guess I could argue both ways..I'm never really good at making decisions anyway. On one hand, if I had the freedom to make a choice, I'll be rather hesitant and the thought "what if this is the wrong move" kinda thing would be going through my mind. Plus, my mind is indeed fickle. On the other hand, no one really likes to have that freedom restricted anyway.

Speaking of choice, I'm really being quite indecisive about my future career options. Past few years, I've changed my mind a few times already. Apparently, most career options just don't appeal to me. And yes, I'm really considering nursing, although I never really saw myself as one. And I 've a hunch my mum isn't exactly behind me on this. Still, I've always had a thing for working in a hospital. A surgical nurse would be cool! (hey, don't laugh k) haha. Have to admit that's a bit inspired from grey's anatomy. At least now I'll be aiming towards that.. I think. Provided I don't change my mind anytime soon. Talk about being fickle..

2006-04-08T10:00:00.000-07:00

Reality Check.

Don't you just love the feeling of lying in bed at night, all snugged up in the blanket, thinking about stuffs stuffs stuffs. haha, lately lotsa things have been going through my mind. Partly cause its the weekends(weekdays,I flop right into bed and knock out in two mins). Anyway, one of which is this-
It's mid April now..Not counting the entire month of june, bearing in mind grad day is mid october.. technically, we only have 5 more months of school! Which is a real short time if you ask me. Weeks seem to be flying past now.. and I'll reaaaally miss school. I know it's the A levels I should be more worried about, but school plays a big part too.
Know the saying "Think before you speak". I think I ought to do just that more often. I just hate it when the slip of my tongue causes me to say something I'll regret later. Not that it happens a lot, I just feel like crap when it does. And that's when sorry won't make a difference I guess, neither can you take back what you say. which sux! ahh.

2006-03-31T06:13:00.000-08:00

Quite a few things happened over the week that I shall pen down. On Monday, I woke up at 7.15am, cause my mum assumed I wasn't going to school(we were both sick). Just a min after, mich calledd, wondering why I wasn't at the bus stop. Felt sooo bad cause I was so afraid she'd be late. Anyways, decided to visit the doc then go to sch, for some reason.. which was kinda silly la, since I felt a lot worse in school. I even slept in maths tutorial! Right under miss lee's nose. haha.
k, Tuesday morning. I meet mich at the bus stop at like 6.55am. The first 985 bus comes and we missed it as usual cause the bus was too crowded. Then the next bus came and there was this wholee big group of people who barged their way onto the bus such that me, mich and this other cj guy were left standing outside. Thing is, if we miss that bus, we'll have a slighly greater then 0.5 probability that we'll be late! And guess what? We were really caught for being late.(There were others who escaped). We almost nicely integrated ourselves with this j2 class until mr isaac lim booked us. =( Went to see michael tan (my second time) and explained to him our story but he just kept shaking his head. Oh well, worst case scenario is doing detention on tues, from 5-7!
Had this bio practical session on wednesdayy. It involved crickets! The worst thing was, we had to grab the cricket with our bare hands and transfer it into the syringe for experiment. I HATE CREEPY CRAWLYS. I mean, I know it's just a small lil' insect and I really tried to overcome my phobia of those creatures.. but it's just a natural reaction. I'll tend to retreat when those things come near me. I can't help it! So anyway, I was thinking of taking it out by reaching out for the feelers but balaji said it would drop. So well, I resorted to letting the lab aunty catch one for me. And it was a super big and active one. I was just holding the plastic, away from me, practically suffocating it of air.. until I exchanged crickets with sarah. Hers was kinda big too, but at least not too jumpy. haha, our poor bio teacher had to put up with all the reactions of the girls in my class. Am crossing my fingers now, they better not make us do that for SPA!
I've always had a fetish for long hair. Just wanted to cut cause my super curly-in-all-directions hair was starting to get annoying. (it can curl 360degrees) haha. I'm just always never prepared to cut it short. Went with elena,daryl,mich and wx to far east. They all got cool new looks! And I well, look the same! (:
And today, I half-heartedly decided to go for pe. I was feeling quite fine and stuff.. I think I'm just not cut out for running. It's always after running long dist. I'll get cramps and today's was pretty bad. Excluded myself from the pulls ups after. Shortly after, I kinda felt sick and the flu virus came back! I was practically just blowing and blowing and blowing my silly nose. it's a wonder why it didn't explode or sth. Came home with fever and slept the whole afternoon. The problem with me is that I'm the kind of person who takes relatively long to recover.. nvm, I should be fine by Monday.

2006-03-25T06:09:00.000-08:00

New Beginning.

I wake up almost every morning now with a backache cause I'm like sleeping on this bed as hard as a rock. It's almost as good as sleeping on wood. >.<> Anywayss, common tests kinda made me reflect on studies. I know I didn't put in as much effort as I should have.. Oh well, but I did better than expected for bio. Strange.
I was soo looking foward to this weekend cause my uncle was supposed to come over with his kid and stay over. Something popped up last min, and they might come next week. And well, there'll prob be two new additions to my house soon. My bro's students in myanmar are coming down here to study and rent out rooms in my house. Hope that turns out to be good news.
And my aunts still tell me I've put on weight. argh. stop already! haha.

(yummy icing cake. I drew the words!)

2006-03-13T08:44:00.000-08:00

Hero

There's a hero if you look inside your heart
You don't have to be afraid of what you are
There's an answer if you reach into your soul
And the sorrow that you know will melt away

And then a hero comes along with the strength to carry on
And you cast your fears aside
And you know you can survive
So when you feel like hope is gone, look inside you and be strong
And you'll finally see the truth, that a hero lies in you

It's a long road when you face the world alone
No one reaches out a hand for you to hold
You can find love if you search within yourself
And the emptiness you felt will disappear

Oh, oh
Lord knows dreams are hard to follow
But don't let anyone tear them away
Hold on, there will be tomorrow
In time
You'll find the way

That a hero lies in you
Mmm that a hero lies in you

I like nus! Considering between majoring in chem and nursing.. between the two, nursing just seems more interesting, and well, I really don't mind working in a hospital. Pharmacy's like wayy out my league now.
Went to the doc yesterday about my headaches, and he said i just need to exercise more! like.. I thought I was gonna get glasses or sth, but my eyesight's still fine. oh wells, maybe I'll try exercising more..
ohh, and I saw two lizards mating in mich's house today! lol. super gross stuff and kinda funny in a way. took superr long to do gp, and I'm not even halfway done! haven't been doing much productive things this hols, as usual. darn, where's my motivation to study hard and get to nus?

Remember the good times,
forget the bad ones.

2006-03-04T06:30:00.000-08:00

The days of mugging right before the test is once again over. Relieved, yet I must say I pretty much screwed up. And I officially hate hate mugging bio cause there's always an info overload after that! haha. So anyways, got back mother tongue results on wednesday, did better than expected. Besides my PASS in oral... I actually thought the examinors were nice! they can be pretty deceiving alright. haha, I'm not complaining, at least I took the stupid oral exam. =p Watched Big Momma(I think that's the spelling) yesterday. Skipped lunch to stay in school for cca meeting. Got retribution tmr, shan't elaborate. haha Anyway, I thought the movie was really okay. The kid in the show was really darn cute though. He kept climbing things and then fall head first! Was kinda funny la.. so if you want a good laugh, go catch it.
Slept 12 hours today and watched Passion of Christ. Such a depressing thought to witness all that. I was cringing and biting on my straw and crying.. Nothing can compare to what Jesus did for us, nothing. it's just... can't explain it.
On a totally different note, I shall put up some reaally adorable pics I got.

2006-02-19T04:18:00.000-08:00

Traumatized.

It’s only oneee more week to CT!
And I don’t seem to be doing anything about it..

Anyways, I’ve been rather affected lately. Noo, not by any virus or anything.. It’s just something within me no one knows about, only I have to deal with. It seems to happening right before me, hope I take it well. Sigh. Reality can be harsh that way. It’s just that when the hope you’re clinging on to fades……. It can be quite hard to take.

And if you think that’s why I’ve been pretty darn lame these days, haha. You’re wrong!

Oh, I really think chocolates make me happier. I was kinda down on Friday, really wanted to stay home at night and just munch on my bar of chocs..(saved that for Sunday) but well, I decided to go to the airport at 1am instead to send my dad off. Yes, my dad left too.. just me and mum at home now. Parents decided to give up two rooms for rent though, either to np students or my bro’s students from Myanmar coming down here. I hope it’s good news for me.

This year’s V day was.. just another day I guess. There were the chocolates and goodies, but I didn’t really feel the V day spirit. But I donated blood that day! Haha, for some reason, I thought they would reject me so I was just trying my luck there. Guess what? They didn’t! And to think the thickness of the needle would have been enough to scare me. Oh well, it wasn’t that bad.. The anesthetic hurt a lil’ but everything was fine after that. Feels good to do something good. =)

2006-01-29T19:09:00.000-08:00

CNY rox!

ok, so I used to think cny was boring cause I was just sitting around at home, sleeping a LOT. yep, nothing much on tv really interests me.. -boring- until I popped by lyn's house! met her oh so dysfunctional (in a good way) family. Her cousins were soo high and funny and I single handedly taught them how to play bridge! =) even they got addicted to it by the end of the day.. haha and those new year goodies!! i'm soo gonna put on weight.
So my headaches these days are getting from bad to worse.. Sometimes I think I'm imagining it for some funny reason.. can't explain why..

Speaking of sleeping... a pic of me sleeping ! =)

oh yes, and i expect my blog to be pretty stagnant for some reason..

2006-01-10T05:06:00.000-08:00

procrastinator..
hmmm. I haven't been blogging much lately cause well... I have nothing much to say. It's gonna be back to the mundane routine of school everyday..and that's no fun to blog about. oh, but clumsy me fell down in school yesterday, for no rhyme or reason..! the wound actually looks a bit sick now after applying cream.
It's been raining sooo much. I resort to wearing a sweater at home now cause it's so cold. Plus, I've been napping way tooo much. Considering the bio test tmr...
so it's confirmed.. My dad's quitting his job here to work in m'sia, which leaves just me and my mum at home. Even she's quitting her night-shift job soon.. Think from now on, I'll be forced to sleep early..
It's almost 9 now and I barely covered ecology and photosynthesis! =x

2005-12-31T03:53:00.000-08:00

Goodbye 05'

I bareely had one hour of sleep last night cause my bro's flight was in the morning. I'm not very fond of goodbyes, especially at the airport and well, having overactive tear ducts does not help.. sighs.. Speaking of goodbyes, I thought I ought to dedicate an entry to 2005. IT'S BEEN A BLAST, like totally..It's been a ride of my life so far..the ups and downs(more ups though) =)And I soo cannot believe it's coming to an end already. There's too many events that happened this I could pen down now. Significant events, and of course not forgetting new experiences and relationships forged this year.. cause that's what probably made the difference. So here's goodbye,
Goodbye to all the moments I'd wish lasted forever,
Goodbye to all the fun and unforgettable times I had,
Memories are here to stay.
I thank my lucky stars for a wonderful year thus far. But but but, I'm also looking foward to an awesome 2006, hopefully. After all, the best is yet to be. haha =p

Happy New Year!

2005-12-25T09:44:00.000-08:00

khabhi kushi khabi gham(moments of sorrow, moments of joy)

I just watched the hindi movie. It's just super touching, never fails to make me tear when I watch it.. and two of my fav. actors star in it. =)
and MERRY CHRISTMAS everyone!
My bro came back yesterday and he finally told my parents! So I'll be off to Myanmar for the wedding in June!!! yay. so exciting, haha. I'm all smiles today. Had guests over for lunch..We ate, were merry.. ok tt's lame.. but yea, still can't wait for Myanmar! wheee. Myanmar, here I comeee.
Don't cry that's it's over, smile that it happened. (sth from the movie)

=)

2005-12-23T07:55:00.000-08:00

MERRY X'MAS

=)) yay! I'm soo looking foward to this year's Christmas.. For one, both my bro's gonna make it for x'mas. oh, and one of them has good newsss. (he's gonna get married and my parents don't know yet) hee. but then again, I didn't actually imagine him settling down in myanmar.. but oh wells...
Mum's been paranoid at home recently..She needs the place to be extremely clean for sunday..and I cleaned up my room after eons!! It feels great to be in a neat room now.. haha. but from experience, it won't last very long..
I was wondering, do dreams mean anything? cause I had this really strange dream some time back..and it just seemed soo real, like I even FELT it happening..creepy rite.. but in my dream, I was having a good time.. if only it was real.
I think I'm pretty screwed in terms of the amount of work I have to get done before school re-opens.. and I still don't have the motivation to finish it.. You know how psyching yourself up sometimes helps?
I'm gonna finish all my homework in time.

2005-12-15T06:06:00.000-08:00

Lazy

Shoooots. So Everyone's saying I'm Bigger now..!! And it's not even Christmas yet!! arghhh
yea..I haven't been blogging for quite some time now..tad bit lazy. Been waking up past 11 almost everyday and I haven't been doing much the past week.. ok, so I finally did something "fulfilling" yesterday. I baked this coffee desert thing and yeah, you guessed it! It was disastrous! it tastes like.. crap? ugh. I think my dad was being nice when he ate the thinggy.. he eats anything anyway..haha. But I'm pretty sure I used the wrong cream cause it's wayy thicker as opposed to the one I saw on tv. moral of the story- don't trust what you see on tv.
Oh and I watched Perhaps Love. It's this chinese musical movie thing.. it was err... haha. the storyline's confusing? I didn't really get the last part.. but some of the scenes were really funny to laugh at though.. it's a wonder why TIMES gave it a good review.
My mum just made nicey fruit cake. There's still cookies to bake.. ohh my, all that food.
Yayyy! I'm sooo looking foward to going JB this sat. Shopping!! =)))
And I still got loads of UN-touched homework.. haha. who's with me on that?
Did you know, there are 1 million ants for every person in the world? haha..yeah, so.. stop wasting your time trying to kill ants. =p

2005-12-01T06:32:00.000-08:00

Days of Nothing-ness

Eating, sleeping, watching tv, using the comp... that's ALL i've been doing lately.. haha. bad bad bad. oh, but the sentosa outing..on Tuesday, i think..was fun! The best part was I managed to make my way across the water in the beach..bearing in mind I can't swim. haha..thanks to corny who had to sadly, pull me across.. I didn't realize we were so deep into the waters until corny told me the water's about 3m deep..i was like....... oh my gosh. I'm afraid of being in waters higher than me! haha..thankfully, I came out safe. You see why I loveee my class so much! =) We were playing monkey, but since I'm quite handicapped in the waters..I didn't really play much..haha. Some of them started getting weird cuts and stuff..so we went back. Back at shore, willie came..and he brought food! chips and fruit cocktail..ohh yes, and we messed up the place quite a bit. After that, we went in the waters and started throwing sand at each other..like wet sand. Silly me was wearing like..denim shorts, so sand got stuck in there and it hurts! haha..we slacked at delifrance for a while before washing up. I changed into elena's fbt's.. which is actually rather comfy and nice to wear.. yes. It took me that long to realize.. imma biiit slow. I wanna get those.. And corn finds my hair amusing..cause it's curlyy! fine..and I look like some monster la. Then I left the rest as they went fish and co. for dinner, cause of my curfew.

I'm boredd. Days of nothing-ness have translated into boredom.. I mean, I was so bored I started downloading hindi songs just now.. hey. don't laugh k. haha..they're nice.. for the moment that is..

random random..It's world AIDS day today. hmmm. wonder how they commemorate this day. hey! pre-marital sex is a no-no. ok..that's all.

was having stomach ache today, for some reason.. and I just took my flu med, which kinda explains why I'm feeling a bit drowsy now.. but it's still earlyyy to sleep. *yawns.

tata

2005-11-27T07:14:00.000-08:00

I love peppermint!

haha..I just think peppermint flavoured stuff rox now..
ok..so I was at One Fullerton yesterday to help out with selling stuffs for MINDS. The sales were bad. The only people who ever bought anything was one of the ladies in management staff and another from a similar stall nearby! It was meant to be till 8pm, but we closed at like 5..haha. terrible place to sell stuff. yep, then me, my bro and his wife went down to suntec..where I had haagen daz ice creeeam! =p. I tried the vanilla choc brownie.. heavenly la. haha.. I was lazy to go home so I went over to my bro's place..where we played Boggle..it's a word game, and I lost terribly at it.. wonder why.. but it was fun la. I almost stayed over but I had no clothes to change into! So I left for home after dinner..lucky mum didn't nag much when she got home.

I was supposed to meet kim today at 9..but silly me woke up late! Didn't go for mass with her in the end..nvm, there's always next week! =) oh yea, so I thought today's kickboxing class would make up for my diet of unhealthy foodstuffs rite.. and today's one was wicked..she made us do all our punches and stuff with dumb bells! like..ouch! haha..and you might see ann with muscles one day.. (right..) lol. Then after class, I had this ice blended oreo mint choc.. after all that work out..hahaha. It was ironically, sinful yet heavenly.. you see, you only live life once! haha..I was thinking of attempting to go one week or sth w/o chocolates! let's see if that works out..

2005-11-25T00:07:00.000-08:00

Home Sweet Home

I'm back from Mawai!. ok..I do kinda think the four days passed pretty fast la, since nothing beats my horrible guides camp.. but it feels good to finally be away from mudd, back home. =) I think I've been applying Mopiko since like..forever. stupid mosquitoes. Oh, and I escaped all leeches, which is quite a miracle la..
Monday
I met mich in the morning.. we were waiting for a cab so long, we decided to call them..then when they made us wait on the line, they actually informed us they had no cabs available! wth! haha..lucky we got a cab not long after tt..We assembled in school.. I brought an extra pair of shoes..but had to buy the rubber shoes anyway..so it was like carrying extra load! Anyways..we took a bus there until we had to cross a small river and the only way to do so was thru' a boat. ok..I gotta admit I was a teeny weeny bit afraid at first(cause I can't swim) but there was the life jacket.. but after crossing the river so many times.. I got used to it. The first activity we had was the world war 2 walk thing.. We were walking along these areas to see some bunkers. Apparently, one of them had carvings on it.. which were of messages to their loved ones before they went to war I think. cool rite.. yep. And it was raining.. by the time we reached back the campsite, it was more muddy than ever! Cariann was being freaking hilarious cause we were wearing slippers and almost every step we took, she sank into the mud.. tried so hard to pull her out..haha. The toilets there...hmm. I'm just glad I don't have to go in there again. Oh but I liked the beds..they were pretty comfy.. food was good too. I actually ate 3 meals a day, which is like soo rare. At night we had this sing-a-long session, willie was being mad singing loudly at some parts..it was pretty fun la..Had a good night's sleep even that day..
Tuesday
We woke up early in the morning. They had 2 activities planned for us that day-water obstacles and swamp walk.. As for the water activities, we couldn't escape falling into the water..was a bit scared at first, but then we had life vests on, so I kinda enjoyed it la. There was one part after finishing one obstacle, corny and mich started putting mud on everyone's faces! haha.. and we washed ourselves by jumping into the water. It started raining and after a while, it got really cold and I was shivering for a while.. Then it was lunch and the ever dreadful muddy swamp walk. We were warned of leeches.. so we bought socks and wore track pants, covered ourselves in raincoats for extra protection. gosh, and cariann couldn't even wear her raincoat properly.. she actually put her head thru' an armhole instead and didn't find out till a teacher noticed! hahah. During the walk, we tried eating certain plants..some had unique taste..and we were even eating on this grass. When we finally entered the swamp, aloy noticed something on my head! It was this really tiny black worm dancing about there and it turned out to be a leech! haha..thankfully, I was wearing a cap at that time.. can't imagine it sucking blood off my face.. At night, our firefly cruise was cancelled! Instead, we were given a briefing on our hike the next day and lights went out early that day I think so we had enough rest for the tiring hike.
Wednesday
Most of us in my group wore shorts for the hike although we were advised to wear track pants.. and so, we were all prepared to be bitten by leeches, but lucky me escaped. Aloy was walking in front of me and he had 4/7 leeches bite him at the exact same spot I think! Luckily, we were blessed with good weather..initially at least. We hiked for about 10km that day.. As we were about to reach the summit, we had to climb this rock wall.. I thought I couldn't do it at first.. but yay! I managed.. Finally at the summit, we had lunch with a great view from above.. kinda hard to believe we trekked so much.. going down was easier, although it started to pour for a while.. That night, the firefly cruise was cancelled once again cause of water current.. oh wells, we did see lovely stars as we were walking to the longhouse.. real nice stuffs. haha..then me and huisi were so lazy that night we just wanted to sleep when we got back to our dorms.. but well, we did get some stuffs done before sleeping! oh and that night was particularly cold! Imagine.. I was wearing long pants, a windbreaker and I had a blanket covering me..but I still woke up in the middle of the night and started shivering!! it was superr cold.
Thursday
haha.. I guess we all couldn't wait to get away from the mud..We gathered for breakfast early, then after me and the girls had biscuits and milo, breakfast arrived! We were lazy to wash plates and everything..so we skipped that. After that was area cleaning, and we got the easy job..picking up litter in our sleeping area. We left campsite pretty early, about 9+ and headed to johor lama..some historical places when Malaysia got invaded. Then we went to the museum.. which was a nice place.. but didn't interest me much..haha. After that, we had a really quick lunch at pizza hut which was super cheap! like $5+ only.. yeap. no time for shopping cause the bus was about to leave..back to singapore! Oh and on the way home, corn decided to send mich home..so he and darcy took the bus with us.. haha. and I only found out about my blister when I reached home..no wonder my toe was aching..
so yea..that's basically what happened..

I really don't know what to do anymore..

2005-11-20T04:37:00.000-08:00

I just realized it's been pretty long since I last blogged.. ok. let me make it up by recounting what happened the past few days..

Friday.
There was this bio course thinggy at science centre.. haha. And I think it was great la.. all this enzyme restriction stuff was pretty interesting. ohh, and my group decided to keep the agarose jelly which we found quite fascinating. Weixin took it home..wonder what's its state like now..cause it was shrinking by the end of the day. hmmm. maybe taking bio wasn't such a bad idea.. =) After the course, me, hazel and weixin left the rest of them(mich,corn,willie,aloy,leslie) to send off laureen. We went to play around the cool stuff at science centre.. first, hazel and I climbed this DNA structure(looking like monkeys) and took pics. =p Then we were at the fountain posing for pics when out of nowhere, water sprung up! And unfortunate me, got wet!! oh wells, not very la.. then the 3 of us were playing in this like merry-go-round thing.. weixin was increasing the speed till after that, I was dizzy and couldn't walk straight!! hahah. *lil kids we were.. At the end of it, we bought ice-cream(yummy..cause I was having a chocolate craving) and walked to the mrt station and headed home.

Saturday.
Didn't do much.. I was awoken by a call from my dad cause he asked he to get printer ink catridge. So me, being an obedient daughter(haha) went down all the way to beauty world(which isn't that far la).. oh and bought stuffs for mawai trip too from watsons.. was looking around for the small plastic bottles to keep my soaps etc..but wasn't available. Nothing to worry about, cause now I have shampoo and soap bottles which my bro conveniently stole from hotels..=) ohh and I went to church, met up with Kim! after eons.. and so graciously lend me her windbreaker.. there was a small party-like event after mass, but kimmy had to leave.. so I didn't stay long either.. I had my dinner and left. It was supposed to be like a "joget" night..(dance) but well, before I left, I saw a few old peeps dancing! haha..

Today.
I woke up SUPERR late! It was almost 12 I think.. (e poor girl slept at almost 4am the night before) haha. I refused to have lunch cause I didn't wanna eat too much before work out. I went down to Westmall, hoping to change money but the stupid person said I need to change a minimum of $50! which I was short of.. oh wells, I saw a nice track pants...and I was so tempted to buy it, I did! but, I kinda needed one like..strechable one for my kickboxing class.. sooo need to save up alr.. oh yes, I still get funny reactions from people when they hear about my kickboxing class.. watch out you!! haha.. jk. it's not a violent sport, really.. Well, today's session wasn't as bad as last week's one.. but my shoulders and my tummy. ouch!
ok..here's the good news. I won't be here the next 4 days.. Mawai.... here I come!!! yays! I predict lotsa fun.. haha. =)

2005-11-12T07:55:00.000-08:00

sMiLe.
Today's actually my first time at Jack's Place..and seriously, their service was pooR! and to think they charged close to 10 bucks just for service charge..! first the guy came to tell us about this promotion thinggy about our drinks.. but apparently, he gave us wrong details. I'm not sure if they over-charged in the end but.. well. just didn't leave a good impression on me.. was at jack's place to celebrate lynny's (aka booby clown) birthday! gosh. it really reminded me of the good ol' days.. when we used to be lame and laugh and laugh and laugh.. we were pretty noisy there.. ohh and mich and lynny had so much trouble cutting up their spring chicken! it was really funny seeing them and all the trouble they had to go thru' just to put some meat in their mouths. yep. so we were walking around after lunch.. taking random pics with the hugee x'mas tree in taka and even with the stuff toys at the basement.. haha.. elmo and cookie monster and ernie.. soo cute! then lynny dragged me and mich all the way to isetan where we slacked at mc cafe for a while before heading home.. and that was my day..

I know this is totally un-related but..Don’t you ever have this feeling of wanting to escape this crazy world? To someplace deep and quiet where you can find yourself maybe. Be alone, and think through of what life has given you till’ this day.. Maybe isolation’s the thing for me now.. I’m still at a lost over certain things..cause things CHANGE and sometimes, it’s just pretty sudden.

I guess I’m the kinda person who’s just not used to change.. I’d prefer to remain in my so-called “comfort zone” and I’m the kind who’d give anything for things to remain the way they are.. cause I don’t anticipate the unknown when things change.. don’t like to either.

And well, things aren't going the way I'd want it right now.. but it's alright! I'll just smile, bottle up my emotions.. and continue with my life. There's no use sulking about it anyway rite? ann's gonna smilee. =)

2005-11-11T06:07:00.000-08:00

ok.. past few days have been really boring cause I was just bumming around at home and cleaning up the house.. until..
cari decided to come over today! haha. yeps. We were all set on baking! "Chocolate Coffee Circles" That's what we made. hah. I guess the texture came out a bit weird..but nevertheless, it was nice..cause of the icing we made. -sugar intake is HIGH for today- *warning.. ann might be having sugar rush. =p
Met her in the morning for lunch..then went to buy stuffs for the cake.. so we didn't get all the ingredients and improvised on some. used milo powder.. and even added nescafe. haha. ohh and mich and audrey came over too.. the were like pounding sugar to make castor sugar. 4 girls in a kitchen.. haha. noisyy!!
oh oh..let me share cariann's recipe on "how to make peppermint essence". Get peppermint leaves.. then squeeze it to get the juice. ta da! of course..we didn't get the peppermint leaves, so yea. we had to make do without peppermint icing..
and..my ear reeeeally hurts now. gotta see the doc tmr morning.

2005-11-07T03:03:00.000-08:00

hurrayyyyyyyy! pw's over! *claps
hahah. although I was kinda hoping the outcome would be better.. my presentation part was pretty much alright, not much stumbling and i didn't really refer to my cue cards.. but the QnA part!! goodness, and anyways, I don't think the oral accessors actually understood my grp's project. you see, it's all about installation of sensors to track seats and he was posing questions to me like "do you think the shape of tables in food courts could complement your idea?".. -.- I gave a really crappy answer..and at the end of it he was like 'thanks for your answer'. talk about being sacarstic.. =( oh wells, I was kinda more elated that pw's over rather than thinking of how badly I screwed up..
I think I'll have lots of time to spare the next few days.. probably ought to start my homework though. so this is what I plan to do..
-start my bio hwk
-go national library and read chem textbooks
-sleep a lot
hahah. not much of a plan there.. hmm. ohh have you guys tried maltesers chocolate? the dark chocolate flavour.. it's damn nicee! =) not that I like dark chocolate very much, but this is nice.. .once you start, you can't stop.
oh I forgot to mention something.. to all my friends out there,
Your PW's not over yet!! go rehearse your speeches!! ahaha =)

2005-11-04T06:21:00.000-08:00

Actually, I didn't imagine myself blogging everyday.. but hmmm.
The day started out boring, with op dry run and everything.. I found myself less prepared this time and worse still, I had to exaplain a diagram which mysteriously didn't upload into the slideshow just now.. Anyways, school ended early so we went out for lunch.
We ended up at far east and tried a different chicken rice stall.. honestly, they all taste the same to me.. haha. not much of a foodie.
here's the best part - we had ice creammm!! yep. the venezia ice cream really rox la..(it's the one at taka, just opposite haagen daz. it's supposed to be fat-free too) The flavours were very rich, and we tried TEN different flavours in all.. haha. was like mad ice cream fest, sitting down at taka and passing the cups around to try all the different flavours. =) special thanks to leslie, who sponsored most of it.. haha. yes cariann, you missed out on GOOD stuffs. =p I didn't stay for long.. reached home before my mum got back! heheh. notty ann.
Well, I shall attempt to concentrate on pw the next few days.. which means, I'll have to practice talking to myself.. oh and I & R to complete. -just a while more, and it'll all be over-

2005-11-03T02:17:00.000-08:00

ok.. let me start by saying HAPPY BIRTHDAY LESLIE! =)
went to town to celebrate his birthday.. the people who came were : me, weixin, aloy, daryl, willie, corny. went a bit earlier in an attempt to video food courts, but it wasn't crowded enough.. heh. so i kinda made willie and aloy bring their cams for nothing.. sry! haha. ohh. and my my, my sense of direction is reeally bad. Just before I left the house, I was like "how to get to cine from borders" Not that I didn't know, just wasn't sure.. cause the last time, I was supposed to go far east, I ended up somewhere else..and well, the rest's history. It's just that I usually go practically everywhere with mich, she's like become my guide. =p haha..I was thinking, put me in an unknown city with a map, and I'll prob cry or sth.. which is not good, I shall learn to be street smart. *laughs
After much contemplation, we decided to have lunch at republic.. had goood food, yet again. Maybe dieting isn't such a good idea, shall start to exercise soon. ohh and poor weixin was like being photographed..tried to dock but the cam phones were surrounding her! and once, she was trying to get daryl's phone...but he conveniently placed it..u know where. Then we were walking around and the guys were being madd..wacking balls and..*gross stuff. guys will always be guys..
We ended up back in cine cause the guys wanted to watch a movie. oh, and I was like so amused by leslie's ipod nano! cause it's sooo thin, and the earphones looked so small somehow.. haha. and I kept playing with the sticker that's supposed to act as a protective layer for the ipod. being retarded for a while..lol. after which, me and weixin left the guys for their movie.
-what a spastic day. It was fun though..and leslie kept getting bugged by me and weixin for our ice cream! yays! cause he agreed to treat us like, venezia in the end.. =p what a kind birthday boy!

2005-11-02T07:33:00.000-08:00

so it's supposedly holidays..but had school today. went back for oral presentation.. and my group was down by two members! but we still went ahead with the presentation anyway.. didn't get much comments from ms lee besides my stupid diagram..haha.
After which, we went to town and weixin suggested subway! so it was like one whole big group of us there..making so much noise. oh oh and I tried fried mars bars! (yes, whatever happened to my diet plan..hmm.) was preeeety good, haha though I was kinda expecting better. yeps. then our dear cariann got bullied again, as usual.. the guys were throwing her wallet round and she tried so hard to get it back..but failed to do so. It was so shocking cause she just walked off after a while.. and so I chased her, who was apparently pissed (but then laughing not long later) =) hint : put up least resistance as possible.
I was reading weixin's entry..and I kinda agree with her. Being a pessimist, you'll be pleasantly suprised when things turn out well. me? I guess I shouldn't have expectations in the people around me.. cause then when something doesn't happen, I'll figure they had better intentions and perhaps, not be so disappointed after all..

2005-11-01T09:38:00.000-08:00

ok.. short entry before i doze off..
i woke up this morning with like, swollen eyes!! cause i slept at 4 am..gosh, shan't do that again. and I went to church with my mum.. yeps. i wanted to ignore her at first, but then..I decided to be nice la.. and neither of us brought up the topic of gg to india! haha.. oh wells,
slept in the afternoon..went to my sis's place for dinner..it was like havoc there. had gooood food.. and that's like 2 days in a row. DIET ACTION..shall start soon. hah. been planning to shed weight since..eons.
oh and kids do say the darnest things.. i met twin kids today(a boy and a girl) they were soo funny, saying the cutest lil' things.. haha. i soo want twin kids! when the time is rite, that is.. ahah.

2005-10-31T06:53:00.000-08:00

Ok. Finally got this up and running..I now know better than to mess with html codes.. thanks Chris. Ok..I got so much to rant about…

Today was my malay AO paper..which also means after today, I’ll won’t have to do anything with malay ever again! Provided I pass, that is. And although I feel stupid for saying this..I think I made my breakthru’ today! I made my feat..okok. here’s what I mean.. my essay title was can money buy happiness. Then for my conclusion, I had one sentence that went something like “Manusia kini lebih mementingkan kebendaan, mereka terlupa tentang orang-orang di sekelilingnya.” which means.. People now become so materialistic, they forget about others around them. Wooohoo. What a way to end my malay episode!

After which, went to pizza hut in plaza sing. We braved the blazing sun and cariann’s whining, walked quite a distance there.. =p Had a feast in pizza hut! We tried the new cheese crust pizza and it turned out to be superr cheesy. Didn’t manage to finish my portion, but I felt bloated after that. We walked around..and just when I was about to leave, me mich wx and cari decided to have ice-cream..under the tree! Haha. Private joke. Yeps. And I left with cari as wx pulled mich back..

Ok, so I returned home at 4.50pm. After mum woke up from sleep, she started scolding me and asking me why I’m always out after college and stuffs.. (it’s only 4.50). I’m like, I only had lunch.. but wells, she continued her ramblings..and I kept silent after that. Then, I realized she found out something which should have been better left unknown to her.. and she was like “HOW AM I EVER GONNA TRUST YOU AGAIN?” shoots la, not that I had any argument against her, cause I did lie to her previously.. plus, she was insisting I don’t go out with boys. -.-

So bla bla bla, I couldn’t really be bothered to pay attention to what she had to say..cause it’s always the same ol’ stuffs..

She cooled down for a while..then SUDDENLY, she was like.. I wanna sell the house and move back to India..you can do your degree there after you’re A’s. I was like, no way. She actually insisted..!! and she sounded serious. Her reasoning? I mix ard with bad people here (apparently kids my age who engage in bgr are bad, which makes me bad myself) I don’t listen to her enough.. and well, she wants to move back there. BUT WHAT THE HECK.

Does she actually expect me to move to India and do my degree there..and then settle down there with some idiot guy I don’t even know..and live happily ever after?? –I don’t even wanna think about it.-

My mum actually thinks of me now as a bad person, I think. I’m a bad bad daughter..not that I’m wild or really, have a problem in school, I’m still bad. Sighz.

Someone just shoot me..